Corri's Blog

Check out my appearance on WGN TV this morning.  Below are the complete answers to the Love Lawyer question and answer session on WGN Morning News segment on February 13, 2009:

QUESTION 1: 
Theresa Taylor (Chicago, Illinois)

Is the economy creating more divorces because of spouses losing jobs and creating financial tension between spouses? If so, is it beneficial to divorce now or wait until your finances are better?

LOVE LAWYER ANSWER:

This is the proverbial $64,000 question that is sparring debate among divorce lawyers all over the United States. In my opinion, the economy may be creating more rifts among married couples but it is not increasing the divorce rates. In fact, it is having the opposite effect. Under the current market conditions, many couples are staying together because they cannot afford to split up. In my opinion,  divorce rates are actually dropping because couples cannot afford to maintain two households and pay legal fees.  This is especially true with the increase in job losses and the decrease in the value of real property.  With house values at an all-time low and difficulties in financing, buying and selling a family home has also become more difficult. As a result, unhappy couples are grappling with the reality of financial problems now more than ever.

There is no easy answer as to whether it is beneficial to divorce now or wait until finances are better.  Given that every couple faces different financial scenarios, the answer is really fact specific and each case is different. For example, if one spouse has been laid off and has tried but cannot find suitable employment, it would be wise to wait until that spouse is employed before jumping ship. Likewise, if you have not been in the workforce for a significant amount of time and you are forced to refinance the family home or purchase a new home due to divorce, you may find that financing may be more difficult than usual because of the banking crisis. However, if you are self-employed and your business has taken a down-turn which reduces the overall value of the business, it may be wise to start the divorce process.

The best way to make a decision is to seek the trusted advice of divorce attorney and/or financial advisor. A professional can advise you on the pros and cons of a divorce and how a divorce will impact your particular economic reality.

Another key question really requires introspection as to whether money will buy happiness or security, for that matter. After  reflection and consideration of your finances and happiness, step back and then determine if your decision will cause you some form of regret. In other words, if you do decide to pursue divorce but then you regret losing your lovely home to a studio apartment, you have really misjudged your definition of happiness.

QUESTION 2: 
Sean O’Connor (Beverly, Illinois)

About 15 years ago, in 1993,  I loaned my then girlfriend about $40,000.  She signed a Promissory Note agreeing to start making payments to me in May of 1996.  I tried to collect from her but she always had some reason she could not pay. We eventually broke up in 2001. I recently found out through a reputable source that she won $100,000 in the Illinois lottery. Can I sue her to collect  on the Promissory Note?

LOVE LAWYER ANSWER:

The answer depends on additional facts which are missing from the question. What is very clear is that Illinois has a 10 year statute of limitations on written instruments or writings. In this scenario, the statute of limitations (SOL) starts to run from the date that payment may be sought which means your statute technically ran in May of 2006 and you may be SOL.  However, you may want to consult with an attorney in this case. There are certain factual scenarios  which serve to toll the statute of limitations, namely, fraud or if the person that owes the money is absent from the State for a period of time.

Here is what is important to remember when loaning money.  If you do loan money to someone, you may want to have an attorney draft an agreement rather than use the promissory notes you buy in the store or pull off the internet.  The benefit of an agreement is that the attorney may incorporate language stating that you are not bound by the 10 year statute of limitations and you may seek repayment outside the 10 year bar.

QUESTION 3: 
Barbara  Scott (Orland Park, Illinois)

I’m going through a terrible custody battle in court. Recently, my teenage son (13 years old) told me that  my husband smoked marijuana with him last weekend when he had visitation. When I confronted my husband, he said it was not a big deal. He said that it was a one time thing and if athletes like Michael Phelps were using drugs, the Court would merely slap his wrist.  I do not want my son exposed to drugs let alone smoking marijuana with his own father.  What can I do?

LOVE LAWYER ANSWER:

The “Michael Phelps” defense did not work very with Kellogg and it will probably not be convincing to a court either.  If you are involved in a custody battle at present, you need to contact your attorney who can file the proper petition in order apprise the court of the facts and potential danger to your son.

Since you did not state where your son resides for purposes of custody or whether temporary custody has been established, it is difficult for me to advise you on the type of pleading that needs to be filed with the court. If your son has his own attorney or a Guardian ad Litem (GAL) has been appointed by the Judge, it is usually advisable for your attorney contact the GAL (or attorney for your son) and advise them of the occurrence.  Once the proper petition is presented, the court will most likely take precautionary measures to ensure the safety and best interests of your son.  Depending on other facts in the case, the Judge may order a suspension of visitation or modification of visitation to prohibit overnight visits, therapy, drug testing or another method to ensure the safety of your son.

QUESTION 4: 
Peter Thompson (Oakbrook, Illinois)

I am 62 years old and have worked very hard my entire life.  My children are grown and successful. After 30 years of an unhappy marriage, the “one and only love of my life” reappeared in my life.  We have been seeing each other-nothing sexual yet. We started right where we left off 32 years ago. I have never loved or been in love like this with anyone and I fear that  I never will again. Trust me when I say this is not lust. I truly believe that I want to get divorced. However, I am not young and I am concerned about losing the financial security that I have strived to attain over the years. Should I follow my heart or do I follow my head and be more concerned about my finances and retirement?

LOVE LAWYER ANSWER:

You know my motto - "Life’s Short. Get a Divorce."

The question is whether you believe that life is too short to stay in an unhappy relationship.

Before answering,  you need to ask yourself the following questions before making a decision: Will security and money bring you more happiness than being with the so called love of your life? If you pass up the love of your life for security, will you regret this decision for the rest of your life? Will you resent the love of your life once you have divorced and do not have as much money?  Is this really the love of your life? Do you have inner happiness without the love of your life?

You may also want to seek assistance of a pastor or therapist who can  assist you with an objective analysis of your decision. Once you answer these difficult questions, you will know which head to follow. Best of Luck.